Mean Girls Movie Transcript - Lindsay Lohan
Daily Mail Online can reveal today that Rosie was then forced to . to Kelly last week, the presenter appeared to infuriate the Latino community. Meet The Quinlans Team · Quinlans Sponsors · Visit Quinlans and Tours . Online here The mother contracts her strong sphincter muscle at the pouch opening to ten years, but the average survival rate for a dispersing sub-adult male living joey weighs less than one gram and looks something like a pink jellybean. The Wizarding World of Harry Potter at Universal Studios Hollywood UPDATE: I got the official word back on the Mother Nature Burger at #KrustyBurger in.
The baby feeds regularly on the pap, and as it grows it emerges totally from the pouch and lies on its mother's belly to feed. Eventually it begins to feed upon fresh leaves as it rides on her back. The young Koala continues to take milk from its mother until it is about a year old, but as it can no longer fit in the pouch, the mother's teat elongates to protrude from the pouch opening. Young Koalas remain with their mothers until the appearance outside the pouch of the next season's joey.
It is then time for the joey to disperse and find its own home range. If a female does not reproduce each year, the joey stays with her longer and has a greater chance of survival alone.
Female Koalas generally live longer than males, as the males are more often injured during fights, and occupy poorer habitat. Males also tend to travel longer distances. Putting a life span on the average Koala can be misleading, as Koalas living in an undisturbed habitat would have a greater life expectancy than those living in suburbia. Some estimates for the average life-span of an adult wild male Koala are ten years, but the average survival rate for a dispersing sub-adult male living near a highway or a housing estate is closer to two or three years.
All about joeys -- for kids! In fact all baby marsupials are called joeys -- like Koala joeys, possum joeys, and sugar glider joeys. All baby marsupials have a very interesting life, from the moment they are born to when they leave their mothers to make their way in the world of the Australian bush. Koala joeys begin their life with an amazing journey A Koala is born: When the mother Koala gives birth, the little joey Koala makes its way to the pouch all by itself, with no help from its mother.
One of the most amazing things about this is that the Koala joey is blind when it is born, and relies totally on its well-developed senses of touch and smell and strong forelimbs and claws to help it get to the pouch. The new-born joey weighs less than one gram and looks something like a pink jellybean. It is roughly 2cm long, blind, hairless, and looks very different to the cute, fluffy little bundle that it will become later. Another amazing thing about the life of a joey Koala: When the joey is about months old it is ready to begin weaning from milk to gumleaves.
To do this, the mother Koala passes on the micro-organisms in her stomach that are necessary to make the digestion of gumleaves possible to her joey. Life outside the pouch: As soon as it begins its diet of gumleaves, the young Koala grows at a much faster rate, becoming more adventurous as it grows bigger and stronger.
But this was Girl World. Your hair looks sexy pushed back. And in Girl World, all the fighting had to be sneaky. All this cranberry juice is making me break out. I have this really good skin stuff I'll bring you. We kept our eyes open for opportunities for sabotage. Your face smells like peppermint. This is ass, you guys. It's been a month, and all we've done is make Regina's face smell like a foot.
I've been really busy with choir. We gotta crack Gretchen Wieners. We crack Gretchen, and then we crack the lock on Regina's whole dirty history. I have to go to Regina's to practice for the talent show. Everybody in the English-speaking world knows that song. They do it every year. Well, I have to learn it. I don't know, I mean, she's so weird. She just, you know, came up to me and started talking to me about crack. Let me tell you something about Janis Ian.
We were best friends in middle school. So then in eighth grade, I started going out with my first boyfriend, Kyle, who was totally gorgeous, but then he moved to Indiana. And Janis was, like, weirdly jealous of him. Like, if I would blow her off to hang out with Kyle, she'd be like, "Why didn't you call me back?
There are gonna be girls there in their bathing suits. She was a lesbian. So then her mom called my mom and started yelling at her. It was so retarded. And then she dropped out of school because no one would talk to her. When she came back in the fall for high school, all of her hair was cut off and she was totally weird, and now I guess she's on crack. I love your skirt. Where did you get it?
It was my mom's in the 's. That is the ugliest F-ing skirt I've ever seen. Oh, my God, I love your bracelet. So are you gonna send any candy canes? I don't send them, I just get them. So you better send me one, byotch. I was definitely sending her one. I was gonna use three candy canes to crack Gretchen Wieners. Four for you, Glenn Cocco. You go, Glenn Cocco. Do we have a Cady Heron here?
And none for Gretchen Wieners. OK, back to Caesar. Once Gretchen thought Regina was mad at her, the secrets started pouring out. All I had to do was wait for one we could use. Welcome to the North Shore High School winter talent show. Let me hear you make some noise. All right, settle down. Our first act calls himself a star on the rise.
Let's hear it for Damian. Don't look at me. Every day is so wonderful I mean, why would Regina send you guys candy canes and not me? Maybe she forgot about you. Yeah, Regina has been acting kind of weird lately. I mean, is something bothering her? Well, I mean, her parents totally don't sleep in the same bed anymore, if that's what you mean. Don't tell her I told you that. I am beautiful in every single way Yes, words can't bring me down Don't you bring me down today I mean, no offense, but why would she send you a candy cane?
She doesn't even like you that much. Maybe she feels weird around me because I'm the only person that knows about her nose job. Pretend you didn't hear that. And the Power of Three. Does it bother you that they still use your original choreography?
Gretchen, switch sides with Cady. But I'm always on your left. That was when there were three of us, and now the tallest go in the middle. But the whole dance will be backwards. I'm always on your left. And right now you're getting on my last nerve.
Jingle bell, jingle bell Jingle bell rock Jingle bells swing And jingle bells ring Snowing and blowing Up bushels of fun Now the jingle hop has begun Jingle bell, jingle bell Jingle bell rock Jingle bells chime In jingle bell time Dancing and prancing In Jingle bell Square In the fr What a bright time It's the right time To rock the night away Jingle bell time Is a swell time To go riding in a one-horse sleigh Giddyap jingle horse Pick up your feet Jingle around the clock Mix and mingle in a jingling beat That's the jingle bell That's the jingle bell That's the jingle bell rock That was the best it ever went!
That's why you wanted to join the Mathletes. Look how red she is. And he totally complimented you. That is so fetch.
Gretchen, stop trying to make "fetch" happen. It's not going to happen. OK, if you even knew how mean she really is. You know that I'm not allowed to wear hoop earrings, right? Two years ago, she told me that hoop earrings were her thing and that I wasn't allowed to wear them anymore.
And then for my Hanukkah, my parents got me this pair of really expensive white-gold hoops. And I had to pretend like I didn't even like them, and it was so sad.
And you know she cheats on Aaron? Every Thursday he thinks she's doing SAT prep. But really, she's hooking up with Shane Oman in the projection room above the auditorium, and I never told anybody that, because I'm such a good friend. Gretchen's secret had put the plan back in motion. After Christmas break, we tried every Thursday to help Aaron catch Regina in the act.
Looks like he's headed for the projection room above the auditorium! Guys, why did we think we could do this? No, we just have to regroup. Think outside our box. They're these weird Swedish nutrition bars. My mom used to give them to the kids in Africa to help them gain weight. They're these weird nutrition bars my mom uses to lose weight. It's all in, like, Swedish or something. Yeah, you know, there's some weird ingredient in them that's not legal in the U.
It just burns up all your carbs. I really wanna lose pounds. Oh, my God, what are you talking about? The weird thing about hanging out with Regina was that I could hate her, and at the same time, I still wanted her to like me. You have really good eyebrows. The meaner Regina was to her, the more Gretchen tried to win Regina back.
She knew it was better to be in The Plastics, hating life than to not be in at all. Because being with The Plastics was like being famous. People looked at you all the time, and everybody just knew stuff about you. That new girl moved here from Africa. That Cady girl is hot. She might even be hotter than Regina George.
I hear Regina George is dating Aaron Samuels again. The two were seen canoodling at Chris Eisel's Halloween party. They've been inseparable ever since. I was a woman possessed. I spent about percent of my time talking about Regina.
And the other percent of the time, I was praying for someone else to bring her up so I could talk about her more. She's not even that good-looking if you really look at her.
Now that's she's getting fatter, she's got pretty big jugs. I could hear people getting bored with me. But I couldn't stop.
It just kept coming up like word vomit. I have this theory that if you cut all her hair off, she'd look like a British man.
You told me that one before. Hey, I'm having an art show. So why don't you take a night off from your double life. What is that smell? Oh, Regina gave me some perfume. You smell like a baby prostitute.
Meanwhile, I was finding any excuse I could to talk to Aaron. I don't get this. Do you get any of this? Kind of seems like you get it. If I was gonna keep this going, I was gonna have to really commit. Damn, Africa, what happened?
You know, I think I need a tutor. I'll tutor you, if you ever wanna get together after school or something. Do you think Regina would mind? You guys are friends. Well, maybe we just won't tell her. So, what did you get for this one? Well, the first time I did it, I got a zero. I got one too. Yeah, you have to check it because sometimes the product of two negative integers is a positive number. Yeah, like negative four and negative six.
Well, you're a good tutor. I can't do this. Look, I know she can be really mean sometimes, but Look, there's good and bad to everybody. It was coming up. I didn't mean to say it, but She's cheating on you! Did he say why? Somebody told him about Shane Oman. He said some guy on the baseball team. I gave him everything. I was half a virgin when I met him. You wanna do something fun?
You wanna go to Taco Bell? I can't go to Taco Bell, I'm on an all-carb diet. God, Karen, you are so stupid! You're not stupid, Karen. I'm failing almost everything. Well, there must be something you're good at. I can put my whole fist in my mouth. I'm kind of psychic.
I have a fifth sense. My breasts can always tell when it's gonna rain. Well, they can tell when it's raining. I have to admit, I was mildly horrified when Aaron didn't immediately ask me to be his girlfriend. I mean, I know he was sad, but how much time did he need? Regina had moved on.
Do you guys need anything? Oh, God love you. But overall, the plan was going pretty well. Aaron had dumped Regina, and she was unknowingly eating calories a day. It was time to turn our attention to the army of skanks. And finally, the nominees for Spring Fling Queen are as follows: What is happening to the world? And the final nominee I couldn't help myself.
It was so easy. Damian, you put me in there too? That's not part of the plan. I didn't put you in there. You mean I'm really nominated? In January, Regina had put a Spring Fling dress on hold at a store called But being Plastic, she needed our advice before she could actually buy it. Can someone zip me up? OK, it must be marked wrong.
No, no, this is just how they work. This is all your water weight. First you bloat, and then you drop pounds like that: But once the water's gone, then you'll be all muscle. It explains it all on the label.
Yeah, everyone in Africa can read Swedish. Ma'am, do you have this in the next size up? We only carry sizes and. You could try Sears.
I need your parents to sign this so they know that you're failing. You know what's weird about your quizzes, Cady, is that all the work is right and just the answers are wrong. Cady, I know that having a boyfriend may seem like the most important thing in the world right now, but you don't have to dumb yourself down to get guys to like you.
I'm broke from getting divorced. The only guy that ever calls my house is Randy from Chase Visa. And you know why? Because I'm a pusher. I pushed my husband into law school.
That was a bust. I pushed myself into working three jobs. And now I'm gonna push you because I know you're smarter than this. And if there's anything I can do for extra credit, please let me know.
I mean, she's totally failing me on purpose because I didn't join those stupid Mathletes! She was so queer. She was like, "I'm a pusher, Cady. She said she works three jobs. You know, I bet she sells drugs on the side to pay for her pathetic divorce. You let it out, honey.
Put it in the book. I know it may look like I'd become a bitch, but that's only because I was acting like a bitch. Hey, I called you last night. How come you didn't call me back? Oh, I got busy. So you need a ride to my art show this weekend? I have to go to Madison with my parents. Well, you wanna watch a movie tonight? I'm doing major Plastic sabotage tonight. But we don't have anything planned for tonight. Oh, I planned this one on my own. Gretchen thinks you're mad at her because she's running for Spring Fling Queen.
Oh, my God, I'm not mad at her. I'm worried about her. I think somebody nominated her as a joke or something. And when nobody votes for her, she's gonna have a total meltdown.
And who's gonna have to take care of her? So you don't think anyone will vote for her? Cady, she's not pretty. I mean, that sounds bad, but whatever.
The Spring Fling Queen is always pretty. And the crazy thing is is that it should be Karen, but people forget about her because she's such a slut. Anyway, I gotta go. I'm going to bed. Well, she's not mad at you. I'm on the other line with Gretchen. She's driving me nuts. She wants to hang out with me tonight, but she told me not to tell you.
Do not hang out with her. You can tell me. Oh, my God, she's so annoying. Just get rid of her. Regina says everyone hates you because you're such a slut. You didn't hear it from me. She has a right to know. I can't go out. Regina, we have to talk to you. Is butter a carb? Regina, you're wearing sweatpants. Those rules aren't real. They were real that day I wore a vest. These sweatpants are all that fits me right now. You can walk home, bitches. Watch where you're going, fat-ass!
Gretchen and Karen followed me around all afternoon. Oh, I have to go to Madison with my parents. We have tickets for this thing. Was I the new queen bee? I can try and get out of it. Because I told my friend Janis I'd go to her art show.
We've had these tickets for months. You love Ladysmith Black Mambazo. But she's my friend, and I made her a promise. I think Cady's old enough to spend one night on her own.
I had learned how to control everyone around me. I'm having a small get-together at my house tomorrow night. Do you think I'm an idiot? No, it's just gonna be a few cool people, and you better be one of them, byotch.
I love that shirt on you. Aaron Samuels was going to be in my house at my party. Everything had to be perfect. And this time when Aaron saw me, I wouldn't be caught in some ridiculous costume.
OK, so I got enough cheese and crackers for eight people. Do you think that's enough? It was not enough. Somehow, the word had gotten out about my small get-together. Jason is here with Taylor Wedell. He's just using her to make you mad. Dude, put on "The Ramayana Monkey Chant". She thinks she's gonna have a party and not invite me? I, like, invented her, you know what I mean? I have to talk to you. Was Aaron blowing me off? Gretchen came to talk to me.
I have to pee. I've been looking for you everywhere. You wanna go downstairs?
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Thanks for getting me to come out tonight. Yeah, sure, no problem. I wasted too much time being pissed off at Regina. I would never lie to you. I know, I know. I mean, I did lie to you once, but you're totally gonna laugh when I tell you, so I pretended to be bad at math so that you'd help me.
But the thing is, I'm not really bad at math. I'm actually really good at math. You're kind of bad at math. Anyways, now I'm failing.
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You're failing on purpose? I just wanted a reason to talk to you. So why didn't you just talk to me? Well, because I couldn't. Because you were her property No, don't tell me to shut up. You are just like a clone of Regina. Oh, no, no, listen to me. You're not listening to me It was coming up again. No, wait a minute Explain how you forgot to invite us to your party? Janis, I cannot stop this car. I have a curfew. You know I couldn't invite you.
I had to pretend to be Plastic. Hey, buddy, you're not pretending anymore. Cold, shiny, hard Plastic. Did you have an awesome time? Did you drink awesome shooters and listen to awesome music, and then just sit around and soak up each other's awesomeness? You're the one who made me like this so you could use me for your eighth-grade revenge.
See, at least me and Regina George know we're mean. You try to act like you're so innocent. Like, "Oh, I used to live in Africa "with all the little birdies and the little monkeys. It's not my fault you're in love with me or something! That is the thing with you Plastics. You think that everybody is in love with you, when actually, everybody hates you.
Like Aaron Samuels, for example. He broke up with Regina and guess what. He still doesn't want you. So why are you still messing with Regina, Cady? I'll tell you why. Because you are a mean girl! You can have this. It won a prize. And I want my pink shirt back! I want my pink shirt back! It's like I can't trust anyone anymore. Coach Carr makes us eat those when we wanna move up a weight class.
They make you gain weight like crazy. This girl is the nastiest skank bitch I've ever met. Do not trust her. She is a fugly slut! I found it in the girls' bathroom. It's so mean, Mr. Trang Pak made out with Coach Carr? OK, calm down, Miss George. Why would someone write that? That's just so mean. Don't worry, we're gonna find out who did it. There's only three girls in the whole school who aren't in it. At your age, you're gonna be having a lot of urges.
You're gonna want to take off your clothes and touch each other. But if you do touch each other, you will get chlamydia. Cady Heron, they wanna see you in the principal's office. In here, Miss Heron. I mean, yes, I've seen it before, but it's not mine. You better get your story straight, Miss Heron, because I'm not messing around here. It's not ours, it's Regina's. Yeah, she's trying to make it look like we wrote it, but really, she wrote it. Miss Wieners, why would Regina refer to herself as a "fugly slut"?
Miss Smith, this is no time to be laughing. We're gonna get to the bottom of this right now. Maybe we're not in that book, because everybody likes us. And I don't wanna be punished for being well-liked. And I don't think my father, the inventor of Toaster Strudel, would be too pleased to hear about this.
Oh, my God, that was one time! Who would write that? Who wouldn't write that? And so did Sun Jin Dinh. You do not push and sh Do you have anything else you wanna say? No, I can't answer any more questions until I have a parent or lawyer present.
Whoever wrote it probably didn't think anyone would ever see it? I hope that nobody else ever does see it. Mom, can you pick me up? That's only OK when I say it. Take your top off! The girls have gone wild. It was full-tilt jungle madness. And it wasn't going away. Hey, I pulled these two off each other. Coach Carr, step away from the underage girls.
Let me help you down there. I did not leave the Southside for this! All junior girls report to the gymnasium immediately! Have you ever walked up to people and realized they were just talking about you? Have you ever had it happen times in a row? Never in my years as an educator have I seen such behavior. And from young ladies. I got parents calling me on the phone asking, "Did someone get shot?
Now, I'm not gonna do that, because we've already paid the DJ. But don't think that I'm not taking this book seriously.
Coach Carr has fled school property. Norbury has been accused of selling drugs. Now, what the young ladies in this grade need is an attitude makeover. And you're gonna get it right now. I don't care how long it takes, I will keep you here all night.
We can't keep them past. I will keep you here until. Now, what we're gonna try to do is fix the way you young ladies relate to each other. So who has a lady problem that they'd like to talk about?
Somebody wrote in that book that I'm lying about being a virgin because I use super-jumbo tampons. But I can't help it if I've got a heavy flow and a wide-set vagina. Yeah, I can't do this. You're a successful, intelligent, caring, graceful woman.
There has to be something you can say to these young ladies. Something to help them with their self-esteem? It's not a self-esteem problem. I think they're all pretty pleased with themselves. Everybody close your eyes. I want you to raise your hand if you have ever had a girl say something bad about you behind your back. Now, close your eyes again. And this time, I want you to raise your hand if you have ever said anything about a friend behind her back.
There's been some girl-on-girl crime here. So, what we could do today is a couple exercises to help you express your anger in a healthy way. Let's start over here.
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Norbury had us confront each other directly about the things that were bothering us. And it seemed like every clique had its own problems. You've been acting really stuck-up ever since you switched to shortfielder. And Dawn agrees with me. Can I just say that we don't have a clique problem at this school?
And some of us shouldn't have to take this workshop, because some of us are just victims in this situation. How many of you have ever felt personally victimized by Regina George? Do you have anything you wanna own up to? You never made up a rumor about anybody? Just that you sell drugs. Nothing you want to apologize for? I couldn't apologize to Ms. Norbury without getting blamed for the whole burn book. I'm really disappointed in you, Cady.
OK, so we're all here because of this book, right? Well, I don't know who wrote this book, but you all have got to stop calling each other sluts and whores. It just makes it OK for guys to call you sluts and whores.
Who here has ever been called a slut? Norbury had us write out apologies to people that we'd hurt in our lives. Laura, I don't hate you because you're fat. You're fat because I hate you. I just wish we could all get along like we used to in middle school. I wish that I could bake a cake made out of rainbows and smiles, and we'd all eat it and be happy. She doesn't even go here! Do you even go to this school? I just have a lot of feelings.
Sharon, I think you're doing a great job. I feel like I'm getting through. I'm sorry that people are so jealous of me. But I can't help it that I'm popular. OK, walk it off.
It's her dream come true, diving into a big pile of girls. OK, yeah, I've got an apology. So I have this friend who is a new student this year. And I convinced her that it would be fun to mess up Regina George's life. So I had her pretend to be friends with Regina, and then she would come to my house after and we would just laugh about all the dumb stuff Regina said. And we gave her these candy bar things that would make her gain weight, and we turned her best friends against her.
You know my friend Cady. She made out with Regina's boyfriend and then convinced him to break up with her. Oh, God, and we gave you foot cream instead of face wash. I am so sorry, Regina. Really, I don't know why I did it. I guess it's probably because I've got a big lesbian crush on you.
I didn't mean for that to happen. To find out that everyone hates me? Do you know what everyone says about you? They say that you're a home-schooled jungle freak, who's a less-hot version of me. So don't try to act so innocent. You can take that fake apology and shove it right up your hairy And that's how Regina George died.
No, I'm totally kidding. But she did get hurt. Some girls say they saw her head go all the way around. But that's just a rumor. Some people swear they saw me push her in front of the bus. That was an even worse rumor. Mom, I didn't do it. I don't know what to believe anymore. Why are my tribal vases under the sink? Why were they under the sink? This is the fertility vase of the Ndebele tribe. All my friends hate me, and now my mom hates me.
Your mom does not hate you. She's afraid of you. I don't know, maybe we mainstream-schooled you too soon. Maybe you should come back and be home-schooled again for a while.
Only thing worse than going back will be not going back. How bad's it gonna be tomorrow? Remember when we saw those lions fighting over the wart hog carcass? I'll be the wart hog. You're not a wart hog, you're a lion. Just focus on your studies for a little while. You're still an excellent student, right? I need you to sign my calculus test. What do they call it? She pushed her in front of the bus. Did you see her do it?
Did your teacher ever try to sell you marijuana or Ecstasy tablets? Duvall, this is ridiculous.