10 Ways to Improve Your Mother-(Adult) Daughter Relationship | HuffPost
Mother-daughter relationships can be the best ever. If you're lucky But if you two have a toxic relationship, things likely won't be this good. If the case Separating our lives from parents is important for healthy relationships.". Try to learn more about your daughter's interests yourself, and do things relating .. My mom and I already have a good relationship, but I want to make it better. Don't wait for the other person to make the first move, said Linda Mintle, Ph.D, marriage and family therapist and author of I Love My Mother, But Practical Help.
Many think that the only way to improve a relationship is for the other person to change their ways.
How to improve your relationship with your mom
Interestingly, this can still alter your relationship. Think of it as a dance, she said. When one person changes their steps, the dance inevitably changes.
Both moms and daughters often have idealistic expectations about their relationship. For instance, kids commonly think their mom will be nurturing and present — always. This idea can develop from an early age. When her kids were young, Mintle found herself setting up this unrealistic belief during their nightly reading time.
Lack of communication is a common challenge with moms and daughters. Be an active listener. They realize conflict is inevitable and they deal with it head on. This applies to mother and daughter relationships, too, she said. Not resolving conflict can have surprising consequences. But pick your battles. Instead of arguing about something so small, Mintle put the hat on and moved on.
Put yourself in her shoes. But a panoramic lens provides a much wider view, letting us see the object in a larger context. Mintle views forgiveness as key for well-being. People often ask us for tips on how to deal with their own mother-daughter struggles, and while we are always happy to share our thoughts, we don't profess to have all the answers.
The mother-daughter relationship is fraught with challenges at every stage of life, and we still have our fair share of squabbles and misunderstandings. But what we have learned is to recognize potential barriers early, communicate openly and most importantly, make up with hugs and declarations of love and gratitude!
5 Ways to Build a Strong Mom-Daughter Bond
Spending relaxed time together while discovering common hobbies and interests helps deepen the mother-daughter bond. For example, we connect over yoga and almost always squeeze in a class when we are together. When we are apart, we chat on the phone about books we are reading. Then explore something that is new to both of you!
Take a knitting class, rent a tandem kayak or go antique shopping.
How to improve your relationship with your mom | The Seattle Times
Carve out time to try a new activity that can bring you closer and create fun memories along the way. While many of us are strong and capable women, we most likely can remember a time when we have been irrational or temperamental, particularly with our mother or daughter. Unfortunately, we often save our worst moods and tempers for those we love. We've learned to recognize each other's bad moods. We point it out and then give "the moody one" the space she needs. We're also learning how to recognize when our anger or criticism is misplaced so we can spare each other unnecessary heartache.
Give and Receive Thoughtful Advice: While we often value each other's advice, it can be difficult for mothers and daughters to be impartial, and feelings can be hurt if advice is not followed. Learn what she loves and learn to love it too… What makes your daughter tick? Whatever her passion is, invest in it with her.
My girls love the theater. Over the years it has become our thing to do together. And much to the first point, as you are listening to her spill her heart out to you, control your reactions to whatever she says. She is bound to say something that is dramatic or inflated, and your motherly instincts will kick in to correct or protect her.
But that response has the potential of shutting her down from opening up again—she might be scared to say something wrong or offensive. Teach her what you know… Your life might look exactly like what your daughter wants to grow up to be, or perhaps it is far from it.
Things such as perseverance, faith, and integrity are essential traits that she will need to enter into the world.
Talk To Someone Now : Lifeline
When my girls ask me for advice it makes me so happy to still be a part of their life. Talk to her about her relationships… Why is it that girls have such a difficult time with friendships growing up? She needs you to show her what a good female to female relationship looks like.